"Oh man, I just saw new footage of what this date fair looks like today. Oh, this is so embarrassing. So you don't know this about me, but I sang in bands all through my 20s and 30s. I was a singer. I know small crowds, but this... Oh, this is so bad. I mean, this is really the kind of thing that would have me reviewing my life choices very closely. Oh, everything he touches truly dies. It is amazing."