"My name is Tapas Maxwell, the CEO of Polycorp, the world's only polycool that is also a private equity-backed corporation. We started off just three of us in a garage in Bushwick. We've now grown to over 5,000 members with offices in New York, London, and Shanghai. When I look across the global network, I see new activations in emerging markets like India, Pakistan, and Chile. Our dynamic daisy chain of throuples, dyads, and metamores gives me confidence that we can get series B funding in 2026 and ultimately f*** each other in one big pile. People ask how a polycule can be a corporation. And listen, Citizens United decreed that corporations are people, so therefore if people are in relationships, then that relationship can be publicly traded on the stock market. There's a lot of paperwork that goes into keeping this place running. We do all our ejaculation tracking and notion, but the fluid logs still have to be done manually. You know, when you scale up a polycule from a Bushwick apartment to a Fortune 500 company, it's obviously going to become a bit more bureaucratic. Sir, we need your blood type, girth, and zip code. Yeah, O positive 11 centimeters, 12545. Hey guys, I don't want to split up the party, but if you're going to switch anchor partners, we do have to fill out a D49 form and submit that to Tracy before we can do any nasty reordering. I'm just trying to do my job, bro. I know. I hear you. So am I. Alright. I used to be the head of directors at Chipotle, but now I'm the director of head at Polycorp. It's kind of a huge learning curve, but there's still a lot of sour cream involved, so I feel right at home. Hey, we're doing a happy hour in an escape room. We're going to lock ourselves in a steampunk clockmakers workshop and do some after hours fluid bonding and gland stimulation if you're interested. Sorry, bro. I'm swamped right now. Come here."